We’ve already discussed that there are inevitably lessons that one will learn after college.  And here’s something you’ll learn courtesy of our old pal, Facebook.

See, all those “friends’ you’ve been accumulating on Facebook since college will gradually show up on your newsfeed.  And every time they do, it won’t be to announce that they’re having a party or got extremely drunk the night before or even that they’re graduating from Grad school.  No.  It will be to announce one of three major milestones that the child in you cringes to hear.

5. Friends will begin to get engaged at an alarming rate.

6. Friends will begin getting married at an alarming rate.

7. Friends will start having babies at an alarming rate.

The problem with hearing these proclamations of joy and receiving invitations to events in which you will be required to purchase gifts and attend sometimes awkward gatherings to celebrate them is yet another fact: this means you are in fact growing up.  Boo.  Hiss.  Take back this declaration of encroaching adulthood.  Yeah.  Take it back now.