So everybody knows that the additional treat that goes with going to the movies are the previews. It’s especially nice when you get paid to record them. Attached to the prestigiously cast film “Contagion” were 5 previews of films that I’d love to see in one venue or another. Observe.
1. Killer Elite: Jason Statham, Clive Owen and Robert DeNiro. Awesome cast but Statham’s films are never guaranteed to be awesome. Fun? Yes. Absurd? Always. Worth money I’ve bled over. Surely not. Final decision: Looks like a good Redbox candidate.
2. 50/50: A cancer comedy. I mean, cancer is one of those things where you have to either laugh or cry and after the millions of depressing cancer films, I’m actually hopeful that taking a cue from Showtime’s “The Big C” humorous approach will pay off and even if it’s dismal, I’ll still get to look at Joseph Gordon Levitt.
3. The Thing: So the same producers who got a hold of “Dawn of the Dead” are taking a crack at this classic paranoia story…in its third re-incarnation. Whereas they’re promising this to be a prequel, I still don’t think it’ll quite be able to live up to its predecessors.
4. Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows: Listen. I loved the first film. Loved it. Still do. Therefore, I will pay my blood money to see this in theaters. Loved Noomi Rapace in the original version of the Millenium Series films plus Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law had incredible chemistry on the first trip. God willing, we won’t have to only rely on their chemistry and animal magnetism to carry the film and ex-Mr. Madonna will deliver another stylish, energized romp with everyone’s eccentric sleuth.
5. The Dark Knight Rises: Look, I’ve been committed to this franchise since I was a toddler. Thus, I will be seeing this film no matter how confident I am that this cannot live up to its predecessor. They’ll really need to sell me on Anne Hathaway as Selina Kyle, I’ma pray Tom Hardy will have his shirt off often as Bane and if Christian Bale growls throughout this movie, both he and Christopher Nolan will receive an angry vulgar soundbite from moi. Oh you’ll get my blood money but, no growling Christian. You’ve been warned.
Well, I have plenty to look forward to in the next few months. Yup, I’ll be researching ways to sell my plasma to pay for my movie tickets…but
I’ll pretty happy about it.